Pets - Top Ten Quotes
"Dogs behaving badly... puppet style" Home Episodes Credits
1 "Even when you reach another plane of conciousness you're still a fucking idiot!" - Hamish
2 "In what sense am I morally obligated to keep my promises to an occasional table? Trevor
3 "Think of death as a window - a sort of a
French window opening out onto a little rear terrace, with a barbecue, and some terracotta
tubs full of geraniums and nice little flowers." JP
4 "If the universe is expanding, does that mean that if you get up in the middle of
the night to go to the toilet, it's a slightly longer walk than it was the night
before?" Trevor
5 "We are not having yet another lengthy judicial investigation into the death of an
international political figure which ultimately leads to a showcase trial in our living
room. It's not going to happen!" Trevor
6 "They'd probably have a really good darts team in Heaven - and everyone would
smile all the time, no-one would use bad language, and there would be free
hairdressing." JP
7 "If there was life after death we wouldn't call death 'death' because it would still be life." Hamish
8 "Following his excursion to the
lunar surface, Buzz Aldrin went completely mad, often turning up at cocktail parties in
Cape Canaveral dressed in nothing but a muslin body stocking and a plastic rain hat. 'It
protects me from the moon's rays' he would say." JP
9 "Why would time and space choose to turn itself inside out between a pile of pillow
cases and some neatly-folded towels?" Hamish
10 "I'm going to put a skewer through your knob" Davina
On Heaven...
On conciousness...
On
morals...